The worst kind of caper

My friend Jess' away message said "the great cupcake caper!" this morning, and I wanted to get the scoop:

me: cupcake capers?!
Jessica: I KNOW
scandal!
me: what's going down??
Jessica: we had cupcakes yesterday
more arrived today
me: whoa
Jessica: and they suddenly disappeared all at once
and NO ONE IS FESSING UP
me: WHOA
that's almost worse!
Jessica: there is a thief in our midst!
a cupcake thief!
the very worst kind
me: that is the worst kind of thief!
who steals a cupcake??
Jessica: who steals a BOX OF CUPCAKES?
heartless
me: so cruel
Jessica: seriously
me: any leads?
Jessica: i have my suspects
i will investigate
me: excellent
forget work, this is far more important
Jessica: i know
i have my priorities straight, don't you worry
this crime will not go unsolved
me: yessss


What kind of world to we live in where cupcakes get stolen?